In April of this year, I published my first book, In Your Element! This book is about manifestation and aligning with your Divine Path. It tell the story of my spiritual growth and how I’ve navigated my challenges using emotional intelligence and spiritual connection. This book is like my baby, it tells so much about the mental battle I have had within the journey of healing my traumas, rewiring the subconscious and putting stories that are not mine aside to uncover my true purpose. I turn this around in every chapter, to teach a lesson so that I can transmute this message further for you and inspire you to not be afraid of the healing journey ahead, but rather provide some insight.
So… today I’m going to give you a sneak peak into a chapter of my book today, I hope you enjoy.
THE CONCEPT OF PLAYING IT SMALL
In the spiritual development world, I’ve ran into the concept of “playing it small” many times.
“Why do you continue to play small?” “What’s keeping you from playing big?”
These questions confused me and rather irritated me! I fought with this question. For goodness sakes, I’m launching courses, writing books, running a podcast, doing collaborations. What the hell does that even mean, how am I possibly playing small, what else do you want from me?
I aspired to an online manifestation coach for a long time that made me confused by this. As her strategy was to be over the top, act like Kim Kardashian, dress extravagantly every single day and it led me to think, “is this what playing it big looks like?”
I just couldn’t play into it, no matter how hard I tried, it didn’t feel true to me. Within this process of trying on new things and eventually coming back to accepting myself as I am, I realized that this topic irritated me because I subconsciously was choosing not to accept what it meant to me.
Usually if something gets under your skin, it’s because y ou still have healing to do within the subject.
After a full day of much needed rest and disconnection from my phone, an intuitive hit came through to me. I was playing small in the belief in myself.
This realization turned this concept of playing it small around completely for me and has allowed me to teach it in ways that people can actually relate to. Rather than thinking they need to try so hard to be perceived as a #badbitch to achieve success.
You could be doing it all… but when someone asks you, “what have you been up to?” What do you say?
I caught myself inside of this as it happened, when I responded that I’m writing a book… how come it was this nonchalant energy? How come I was treating it like no big deal? Why did I feel weird talking to my family about what it’s all about?
Why did I feel fear around saying that I’m quitting my job and traveling to reconnect and align with my Element of inspiration that I believe will bring me happiness and therefore success? Why did I feel like I needed to justify it?
But most of all… why didn’t I instead feel empowered by these actions and decisions? They empowered me, but I knew they wouldn’t empower the people in my circle that are conditioned to the regular loop of 9-5, living for the weekends and paying your bills kind of life.
So I would play small. I wouldn’t talk about it much, I would play my big projects down a notch and within that, it made it grow slowly. This made big scary decisions even scarier and it made the very topics that I teach become something that I needed to prove to everyone around me.
So I would play small, again. In an environment that didn’t inspire me, with this longing to travel, this longing to move from my hometown. I longed for people that would have energetic response when I talk about how I’m doing big things in the world, but I also needed to believe that for myself before people could see it too.
Do you see how this seems to be this circle that leads you back to the same position you’ve always been in? Do you see how all this results in you playing small?
Playing small is the same concept that we often don’t want to accept. Clinging onto our current reality while trying to step into a new one and wondering why it hasn’t shown up already.
When you’re at the same job, the same home, the same town, the same friends, same relationship, same routine… same loop. If the reality you desire is far from this one, then you must supply the movement.
You must come into alignment with it all.
There are situations where your mindset and your energy are what needs to change… then there are times where you’re fighting everything but the physical action that is needed.
Playing small is like staying where you’re at, not making TOO big of a deal of the massive things you are creating in the world, because if you did then you’d have to truly believe it, truly step into all its magnificence and own your power!
You’d have to make all the decisions , take all the big leaps that are required of you. But this just where your expansive experience lies, on the other side of the resistance within you to play it small.
As I’m writing this to you, a friend of ours (my boyfriend and I) is in critical care… the doctors say he has zero chance.
To be honest, I wasn’t incredibly close with him, but we went out for drinks, had casino runs and lunch dates together a number of times. My boyfriend has known him since the 8th grade.
At 43, a sudden stroke, despite his relatively clean slate of health beforehand.
So why am I bringing you this grim news? Well, I believe that our friend was meant to teach the greatest lesson of all… that life is shot lived and unpredictable. That time is a gift, not a privilege.
It’s moments like these where the world stops for a minute and we tend to soak in moments deeper. When we begin to pay attention and gain presence in our lives.
It could have been anyone. It could have been me.
It’s these realizations that allow me to think deeper, “if my heart were to give out and move to the next life today… would I have fulfilled this life?”
Would you have said yes to more things, maybe said no to others? Would you have made the leap, done the scary thing, said “I love you” to that person or set that boundary with another? Would you have traveled to that place, taken that road trip, went on that adventure? Would you have started that business, written that book, shared that message?
It’s in these moments that I remind myself of one things… What are we waiting for? What are we waiting for to do the things that make us happy and fulfill our souls in this lifetime?
Or are we simply waiting to die? Are we simply waiting to start the next life, believe that it’s too late for us now?
We were put here with purpose, nothing is by accident and our callings are what we are meant to fulfill, no matter how “unrealistic” and no matter how scary.
We tend to fight them for so long and moments like these happen to shake and awake us to realize that this life is unpredictable, tomorrow is not guaranteed. We hear this so often and yet we never act upon the fact.
If you were to live your life as if tomorrow was not guaranteed, how would you live it? This is the life you were meant to live, simply because it calls you.
Would you start the youTube channel, the blog, the business, the coaching program, the mentorship, the book, the photography biz, travel to that place and the next place, do the dance class, paint the painting, start the Etsy shop or the physical shop? Would you record the song, start the family, cast for that movie or that modeling shoot, apply for that big job, talk to that person, set boundaries with another, say yes to the adventure?
Anything but… is playing it small. Not stepping into your callings, not stepping into what truly lights you up is playing it small.
I hope you enjoyed this excerpt from my book! If you would like to continue your read, In Your Element is available on Amazon and you can purchase it here! 🙂